One day at station duty we found one of the cardboard models of the new Category 11 tankers. We decided to 'field test' it in an overrun incident! Have a look below!
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Selection Criteria for Captains - Deputy Captains - Members
For those who are never certain about their elected roles in their brigade
- Captains
- Leaps tall buildings with a single bound
- Is more powerful than a locomotive
- Is faster than a speeding bullet
- Walks on water
- Gives policy to God
- Senior Deputy Captain
- Leaps short buildings with a single bound
- Is more powerful than a switch engine
- Is just as fast as a speeding bullet
- Walks on water if the sea is calm
- Talks with God
- Deputy Captain No. 1
- Barely clears medium sized gum trees
- Loses tug of war with a locomotive
- Can fire speeding bullets
- Swims well
- Is occasionally addressed by Gods secretary
- Deputy Captain No. 2
- Steps over dog houses with ease
- Recognises locomotives with ease
- Can fire an air gun
- Can float on back in water
- Can talk with God's secretary if a special request is approved
- Deputy Captian No. 3
- Runs into buildings
- Recognises locomotives 2 out of 3 times
- Is not issued with ammunition
- Can stay afloat if properly instructed in the use of a Mae West
- Talks to walls
- Deputy Captain No. 4
- Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings
- Says "look at the choo choo train!"
- Wets himself with a water pistol
- Plays happily in mud puddles
- Mumbles to himself
- Rural Fire Service Member
- Lifts buildings
- Kicks locomotives off track
- Catches speeding bullets in teeth and eats them
- Freezes water with a single glance
- IS GOD!
The above were given to me by our Captain, Chris. Needless to say, we all got a great laugh out of them!
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Just another pic I recieved at work via the good old email. Tell you what, theres been a few fires that i've been to where I wish I could've done the same! Click on the thumbnail below!
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Recently our brigade recieved an old Mazda car for MVA training. During our first training night after the New Year, on of our members noticed something different about the car. It seems that while we were on holidays, someone decided to 'borrow' the front right hand wheel! See the pic below!
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This is something that was emailed to me at work. This was written in 1994 by Lindsay Gorrie, who is a member of the Grose Wold Rural Fire Brigade from the Hawkesbury District. To view their website, please go to the Links page.
MURPHY LAWS OF FIRE FIGHTING
- 1. If it's a stupid idea but works, it isn't stupid
- 2. Don't look conspicuous, it attracts work
- 3. When in doubt, empty your knapsack on the nearest tree stump
- 4. Never work at a fire that is braver than you.
- 5. Never forget that your equipment was made by the lowest bidder
- 6. If your efforts are going really great, you're at the wrong fire
- 7. No plan survives the first contact
- 8. All fire fronts 1 hour away, will arrive in 30 minutes
- 9. Try to look unfit, they may be running out of people for the rake hoe line.
- 10. A fireball has the right of way
- 11. The media will turn up, just as your brilliant plan turns to shit.
- 12. When you have an area under control, don't forget to tell the fire.
- 13. When the Commissioner rings, the fire is always under control.
- 14. That unimportant fire you are ignoring is the main front.
- 15. The easy way will always be full of wombat holes
- 16. If you are short of everything except fire, things are going as per normal.
- 17. No fire crew has ever passed inspection.
- 18. Things that must work together, usually aren't shipped together.
- 19. The hose will have round thread and the branch will have storz.
- 20. Portable radio batteries will fail at the precise moment you need help.
- 21. Anything you do will be wrong, including doing nothing.
- 22. If you put out more fire than you are asked too, you will be given more fire to put out.
- 23. You will always have more fire than you do water.
- 24. With a little organisation, chaos can be assured.
- 25. If one item is hard to get, make sure you grab three.
- 26. If you grab a brush hook instead of a rake hoe, you will need the rake hoe.
- 27. The distance from a piece of equipment you need, is directly proportional to the urgency in which you need it.
- 28. It is easier to receive forgiveness than permission.
- 29. When accused, admit nothing, deny everything, and make counter accusations.
- 30. Success forgives all sins.
- 31. You will run out of pump fuel, just as the main front is approaching.
- 32. That firebreak you spent all night constructing, is in the wrong place.
- 33. Any wind blows no good
- 34. Your biggest save will have no witnesses.
- 35. Your biggest mistake will have hundreds.
- 36. When you need to put in a quick back burn, nobody will have a match.
- 37. The person who contributed least to the fire fighting effort, will be the only one interviewed on the six o-clock news.
- 38. No matter how bad things get, it will look much worse on TV.
- 39. The maps Head Office sent you will be the wrong ones.
- 40. Reinforcements will arrive, as soon as the fire is contained.
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Kid's logic
A fire fighter is working outside the station when he notices a little girl in a little red wagon with little ladders on the sides, a garden hose coiled in the middle, and wearing a fire fighter's helment.
The wagon is being pulled by her dog and cat.
The fire fighter takes a closer look. "That sure is a nice fire truck," the fire fighter says with admiration.
"Thanks," the little girl says.
The fire fighter notices the little girl has tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.
"Little Partner," the fire fighter says, " I don't want to tell you howto run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster."
The little girl replies thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but... then I wouldn't have a siren,"
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